Oh the Weather Outside is Frightful

If only I could have a fireplace in Franice. That would make for the perfect "winter storm." 

While I have loved only having one class today it is kind of bittersweet at the same time. You see, today was the last full day of classes for the Fall semester. What? Finals begin Monday. Friday I will officially have one semester of school left and be on my way to Branson.

Can I just go back to Kindergarton? I would like those naps I never took. Then again, today is the perfect day to catch up on sleep. What do I decided to do though? Watch movies, Boy Meets World, drink coffee and eat Junior Mints. That's even better than taking a nap. Right? Ha. 

It definitely is relaxing.

I should be cleaning my room and washing dishes though... Ha. That won't happen until tomorrow.

Then there is that Comm. Law test that I need study for. Ha. Again, that will begin tomorrow.

Right now though, while the weather is oh, so frightful... I am going to take advantage of the perfect oppurtunity to just enjoy a relaxing day of a lazy evening.

God Bless,

Kaitie 

7 Weeks of Semester

Can you believe that there is only seven weeks of this semester left? That is including Thanksgiving Break and Finals week. That to me is absolutely crazy!

Also, yesterday I registered for my last semester of college! Just let that sink in. My last semester of college. Yikes! Reality will soon strike!

One thing that I am really looking forward to though is what I get to do the day after graduation. I graduate on May 10 and on May 11 I leave for EUROPE!!! I am so excited.

20 days in Europe. What?

On another note.... I turned 21 on October 21st!!!
I love birthdays. Mainly my birthday. Haha. It made Monday a good day. Ha.

That weekend was Fall Break so I was able to go home and spend time with my family and my best friend. It was great. A break and birthday celebration was just what I needed. It still wasn't long enough though. Ha.

Also, the week before my parents bought me Bon Jovi tickets for my birthday. Let me tell you, Bon Jovi is so attractive. I loved going to his concert. Literally the best concert I have ever been to. I went with my mom and I am pretty sure that she sang louder than me. That wasn't strange at all.

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I don't know if y'all watch Hart of Dixie but it is one of my favorite shows. I am currently watching it as I type this blog. I didn't realize that it was back on again so I have several episodes that I can catch up on. It makes my senioritis even worse. Oh well.

I hope that you all have a great Tuesday!

God Bless,
Kaitie

Peaceful Mornings

Okay, so maybe my mornings don't begin out completely peaceful...

Two weeks ago I begin Insanity for my second time. (I think it's more difficult the second time around.) I have been getting up at 6:30 in the morning every morning minus Saturday's and Sunday's. For some reason, I have become this health guru again.

Insanity's 40 minute workouts kick my butt, but I seem to be getting physically stronger and more fit. Makes any girl feel good, right? It's totally worth the early wake-up calls and sweat.

So I wake up every weekday at 6:30am. I know, I am completely ridiculous. Let me tell you though, I feel great. My favorite thing about the whole getting up early thing though is the time in the morning after my daily workout that I get.

After my workout I shower, eat breakfast and just prepare myself for the day ahead. I feel like my mornings really set the tone for how my day is.

Sometimes I will just sit in the quiet. Sometimes I do some homework. Sometimes I will watch episodes of Sabrina the Teenage Witch (or when Boy Meets World is on, I will watch that!). Sometimes I will browse Pinterest and Facebook. And my personal favorite, I sometimes listen to bluegrass hymns on Pandora. (Which is what I am currently doing as I type this blog.)

Along with being physically healthy though, I am really working on being spiritually healthy. Why, yes I feel like I have a strong relationship with God it can always be made stronger. There is always something that I can improve on in my life.

Being physically, emotionally and most important spiritually healthy has just been heavy on my heart lately. So... here I am just trying to achieve the goal that I have set for myself.

It can be quite difficult at times and chocolate cake is one of my weaknesses, but resisting temptation make me feel even better in the long run than eating that piece of cake. Ha.

Have a very blessed Monday!

God Bless,
Kaitie

Tomorrow, Tomorrow, I Love You!

Tomorrow is the day!

No, not my wedding day. I do not even have a boyfriend so that is definitely not tomorrow.

No, I am not leaving for an awesome vacation. I wish, but no that is not it either.

Tomorrow is the day that I am officially done with summer school!!! Words cannot express how excited I am to take my two finals tomorrow and say, "Adios" to my history and science class.

It has been a summer full of studying and busyness that I had not fully prepared myself for. I am glad that God has given me the perseverance that I needed to get through this crazy summer of taking seventeen hours plus completing an internship. People think I am crazy for taking on so much and I cannot say I blame them. There have definitely been times this summer when I have thought, "What did I get myself into?" However, if I had to do it all over again there is no doubt in my mind that I would.

Anyway, I had to dedicate a blog to just celebrate the fact that tomorrow is the day that I am DONE with summer school!

I hope that you have a wonderful Monday tomorrow like I know I am going to have.

God Bless,
Kaitie

A Country Song

"I'd start walkin' your way. You'd start walkin' mine. We'd meet in the middle neath that old Georgia Pine. We'd gain a lot of ground cause we both give a little. Ain't no road too long when we meet in the middle." 

-Diamond Rio, Meet in the Middle

This song has suddenly been stuck in my head. Good thing I love it. Hah.

God Bless,

Kaitie

Closure

Closure

Not having closure is like not having a punctuation mark at the end of a sentence or a complete

(See what I did there?)

I have been in deep thought lately about the word 'closure.' What does it mean to have true closure over a situation, a relationship? Is not having closure a bad thing? Does closure really help us move on with things in our life to focus on better things for us? So many thoughts begin to race my mind as I think of the simple word 'closure.' However, while it may be a simple word to speak it is not a simple word to digest in means of living and moving on. (This may sound scattered, but bear with me. I promise that I am doing my best to explain my over-thinking mind.)

Closure

Not having closure is like not having a punctuation mark at the end of a sentence

Ever had a break up where there was absolutely no closure? It can drive one mad, I tell you. Not knowing the what-if's, not knowing if your ex is over you, not knowing if there could ever be anything "better." Like I said, it can drive one mad.

However, the word 'closure' is technically defined as coming to an end. So if something stops unexpectedly, a relationship ends suddenly, has the circumstance not ended? Even if it may not be "over" or "ended" in our minds, the situation has still ended. Hasn't it? But then again, my mind is mad because I have lacked closure so the answer is not a simple yes... Or is it?

Notice if you take the first three letters away of the word 'closure' you are left with the word 'sure.' Ironic? Maybe. Maybe not.

(By the way, I am not getting technical here, okay? I am just analyzing the word 'closure' for myself. So yes, what I may make notice of may be completely false; but welcome to my thought process. After all, is reading my blog mainly to read my thought process anyway?)

So... back to the word 'sure.' How are you sure that you have closure? Are you sure when you don't think about the situation or person anymore or for at least long periods of time? (Say, um, two days straight? Ha, okay.)

Maybe being sure that you finally have closure is knowing that yes, every now and then you will be reminded of the situation or person, but deep down in your heart you know "the end" is better for you. You know that you are happier without... Even if that means you don't have full closure? This brings me to my next point of my scattered thoughts.

Closure

Not having closure is like not having a complete

So what if you are sure that you have closure. What if not having closure is having closure. Okay, okay this sounds like the saying, "You can't have your cake and eat it too." But again, just bear with me. What if you know without a doubt that the situation or relationship is over. There does not need to be closure because you are able to follow your gut instinct, your heart to know that it is over. So, whether or not you and the people involved have had mutual closure, you know that not having closure is having closure. A sure form of closure. Make sense? Okay. (I am going to pretend you nodded yes.)

Different scenario: What if you aren't certain that the situation or relationship is over, yet you know that you will never go back even if the opportunity did arise? Is not that having closure? Again, this closure may not be mutual especially considering that you could possibly go back to the situation. However, you know that it is best (whether you want to or not) not to go back to the situation or relationship. Is that not a form a closure? While this may not be a sure form of closure, you still have closure. Make sense? Okay. (Again, you are nodding your head yes in my mind.)

Closure

All in all, maybe not having an ending punctuation mark or complete thought is perfectly

God Bless,
Kaitie

Father's Day

I would like to take this time to simply say Happy Father's Day to all the dads, grandpas, and father-figures out there. I would also like to take the time to let those who are missing their dad or father-figure today that I am praying for you. I am praying for those dad's who have lost their children. I am praying for those who do not have a father in their life. 

I want you to know that if you do not have an earthy father you have a Heavenly Father who loves you unconditionally and He will never forsake you. Never. 

I also, want to take the time to say Happy Father's Day to the world's best dad, my dad, (Yes, I'm bias.) I love him with my whole-being and while my biological dad wanted nothing to do with me I am thankful that he stepped up to be a man that he did not have to be. He is my true daddy. I even look like him and share his characteristics. (God always knows what He is doing.) He leads by example and I strive to follow his example of leadership and his servants heart for others. I will always be his little girl.

Love you, Daddy!

God Bless,

Kaitie 

Catchy Songs

Ever have a song stuck in your head just for the simple fact that it is catchy? Well, I am there right now. I have the song Be Ok by Ingrid Michaelson stuck in my head.

Luckily, I know more than two lines because we all know that typically when we get a song stuck in our head we only know two lines. Therefore, we constantly repeat them over and over and we know that we are getting on peoples nerves because we are getting on our own nerves.

Well, this is my random blog for the day. Yay, me.

Have a wonderful Friday! :)

God Bless,
Kaitie

Saturday Morning Coffee

This is a post another blog of mine that was written in the Fall of 2012. I know that is awhile back, but I really wanted to share this with y'all. It makes my heart happy to read these words.

Today I met with a family friend for a class assignment. I had to interview a woman who was or is currently in a women's ministry leadership position. Let me begin by saying that I have never enjoyed an assignment as much as I did this one.

I have never really talked one-on-one with this lovely lady. We have always been acquaintances. I know her because she is one of my aunts best friends. However, today, that has changed.

After an hour or so of sipping coffee, chit chat, and me interviewing her about her life in ministry I consider her a new friend.

When I woke up this morning I was having such a difficult time making myself get out of bed. I was excited about meeting with her and picking her brain on things, but it's Saturday. The last thing I wanted to do was get up at 7am to do a homework assignment.

Once, I was at the local coffee shop and sitting with her and listening to her wise words and advice, I totally forgot about having to get up early. I was enjoying myself and felt myself being inspired. She is such a phenomenal women. I think we could have talked forever. (We are girls though and Lord knows we love to talk!)

I don't know how your Saturday is going, but my Saturday morning coffee with a new friend has definitely made my whole day and it's only 11:12am!

God Bless,

Kaitie

Late Night Thinking...

Typically, late night thinking does not do me much good. In fact, if I liked taking medicine the moment I felt not so-good-thoughts pop into my mind I would take some sleeping pills to avoid losing sleep to meaningless pondering.

However, tonight is different. I am unable to sleep because I am thinking about how blessed I am to be right where I am. I could not imagine being any place else or even wanting to be any place else. (I could do away with my Biology class, but that is for a totally different blog post. Ha.) Seriously though. I am truly happy. I am truly blessed beyond what I deserve.

It amazes me how days (even moments) add up to lead you to where you need to be. 

Those nights that I have been wide awake thinking about how I could have done things better, made better choices, etc. have actually led me to be thinking about all the positives tonight. Without the hardships, the tears, the letdowns, the mistakes I would not be able to know what good I have now.

*Note that during the hardships, the tears, the letdowns, the mistakes that I did have it good it was just difficult for my eyes to realize that I was being prepared for something better. I was growing up.

I am still growing up. I am still learning. I am still making mistakes. I am still going to go through some hardships and letdowns. I will even have more tears. However, I know that the outcome when everything is said and done that I will be a better person because of them if I choose to grow from those moments and not relive them every night.

Late night thinking is often dangerous, but being able to train your brain to think about positive things in your life can lead to late night thinking that is encouraging.

God Bless,
Kaitie

Breaking the Silence

Sometimes people may come off as rude or unsocial. Maybe this is the case sometimes. However, I have come to observe that we do not like awkwardness. We do not like awkward silence. So what do we do? We pull out our cell phones and look like we are doing something important.

Why do we not just strike up a conversation? We are just making the whole situation even more awkward by trying to ignore it.

Speak up. Strike up a conversation. People will surprise you in the fact that they are friendly. What are we so afraid of? We are so afraid to speak up. I challenge you and myself to speak up and break the silence.

God Bless,
Kaitie

When Did I Become Old Enough...

When did I become old enough to be attending friends weddings?

I know I am twenty and this is the time that people often become engaged, but I do not feel like all these people should be my friends.

Literally, this summer alone I have/had the option of attending five weddings. Five. Five weddings in which all the people getting married are 20-23 years old. What?

Here I am... single... no prospect... 20 years old...

It is sometimes kind of disheartening. I really want to be planning a wedding. I mean, what girl doesn't dream of her fairytale wedding with the Prince Charming waiting there at the altar?

I am not wanting to rush anything by any means. I know God has a plan, but sometimes I get a little impatient. Plus, it does not make it easier that your best friend has a boyfriend that you know that she is going to be marry (even though they have been only dating for a short while... you just know) and all your friends around you are planning away or even already married.

It is just so mind-blowing to me that I am in this stage of life.

I cannot wait to begin planning a wedding, but more importantly I cannot wait to plan a wedding with the man of my dreams. If I have to wait a little while longer for him to show up, okay. But... in all honesty sometimes that is not an easy thing... you know, to wait patiently.

Plus, Pinterest just makes the whole situation worse. Ha.

God Bless,
Kaitie

A Cherished Friendship

This is a blog that I wrote on another account one evening. I would like to share it with you on this account. Maybe you can relate... :)

Today I saw one of my very best friends from high school. We attend the same college, but have different majors so we rarely see each other. However, whenever we do run into each other we always stop and talk. Typically, these talks end up being about thirty minutes or so. After every conversation I always leave so thankful for the friendship I have with him. 

He is one of those guys that is shy until you get to know him, but once he is comfortable around you he is one of the funniest, most kind-hearted guys you will ever know. We always joke around and mess with each other. In fact, if we haven't seen each other in awhile we will send each other corny jokes via text. 

He is one of those guys who could know everything bad about me and still respect who I am and treat me with dignity. It does not matter if we haven't talked in years, we always pick right back up where our last conversation had ended. 

No, I don't want him to be my boyfriend. His friendship is of great value to me and I respect him for everything he is and does. I will make sure that I always stay in touch with him for I know his friendship is one that will last a lifetime. It is a cherished friendship.

God Bless,

Kaitie

I'm Afraid You'll Forget

I just listened to the song Edge of Desire by John Mayer. I have to be honest, I absolutely love this song. As I was listening, I was paying attention to the words more than I ever have. A phrase that stood out to me the most was this:

I want you so bad I'll go back on the things I believe.

There I just said it, 

I'm afraid you'll forget about me. 

Think about those words for a moment. Let them sink in. What do they mean and speak to you?

Here's the part where I tell you what they mean to me... You ready? Okay.

Well, I think about how often we as human-beings will not stand-firm in something that we believe because we are afraid of losing a relationship whether that be a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, a friendship, or even a family member.

Maybe we will go back on something we believe in a class that doesn't share the same religious views so in order to make an A we disregard our beliefs. 

Maybe it is even materialistic and we are afraid of losing something that it causes us to lie. 

I know that this song is talking about relationship. I get that, but how often do we even see this outside of boyfriend/girlfriend relationships?

People who want to please those around them - People Pleasers - don't want to disappoint so they do everything they can do to make people like them.

People don't want to be forgotten about. When people feel like they are being forgotten or becoming lost to the person they love, they will do ridiculous things to gain their attention back.

I've seen it. You have probably seen it. I have been a victim. And you yourself have probably been a victim.

We need to be able to recognize when it is okay to step out of comfort zones, not disregard our beliefs, but also notice a different perspective to show that we truly care about people. 

Don't cause someone to give up on something they believe in by making them feel like they are going to lose you.

Homosexuality is a hot topic right now. Therefore, I am going to use this as an example... I have some very good friends who are gay. Do I agree with it? No, I don't. Do they know where I stand on the issue? Yes, they do. Do they know that I still love them and will be there for them? Absolutely, they do!

Just because I don't agree with something doesn't mean that I will leave them stranded. Some of my friends don't agree with everything I may say, think, or do, but do I feel like they hate me and are going to desert me as a friend. No, I don't. Not by any means.

In conclusion, I know this blog was kind of random; but I hope that you got what I was trying to say. Again, yes I know that Edge of Desire is a song about a relationship, but when I tend to ponder words and phrases I can learn so much that even the artist or author was not trying to teach. I guess it's just the writer in myself. I love to analyze words. Haha.

God Bless,

Kaitie 

Think Too Much?

You know that feeling when your brain says one thing and your heart says another?

Do you go with your thoughts? Do you follow your heart?

It's difficult enough to follow your heart. It doesn't help that as a girl your thoughts run rampant.

If there is ever a time when both your thoughts and heart align, dive in! There is nothing more calming then knowing both your heart and thoughts agree with one another.

God Bless,
Kaitie

Someone To Believe In You

Sometimes all it takes for you to get the motivation you need is to know that someone else believes in you.

I know for myself that whenever I feel inadequate, when I get the encouragement of a respected friend or respected adult it makes me believe in myself.

I know also that for myself when I begin to feel inadequate it is because I am comparing myself to those around me.

I feel like so much today we are comparing ourselves to those around us. We need to STOP. God has not intended for us to compare ourselves to others. He has not intended for us to compare our strengths, our talents, our looks, our possessions, anything to others.

God has a purpose, a plan, for each one of His children that only they themselves can fulfill. My purpose is different from yours and requires for me to have different talents, a different personality than you. That does not make better. That does not make me any less important. We are the body of Christ.

STOP comparing yourself to others. Believe in yourself. Find inspiration in the little things. When you find yourself being self-critical reevaluate yourself to make sure you are not comparing yourself to those around you. Pray to God and ask that He allow you to see yourself the way that He sees you.

God has given you a purpose that only you can fulfill. God believes in you. God believes in me. He has trusted us to fulfill a plan. He is using us to do His Kingdom work on the earth because He believes in us. He believes in you.

I don't know about you, but to know that God believes in me is the best motivation I can have.

God Bless,
Kaitie

Best Friend Therapy

Sometimes all you need in life is your best friend to talk things over with. 

I love my best friend so much. She is always there to listen to me vent. 

She tells me what I need to hear.

Sometimes I talk to her because I now she is bias. Haha.

And there are other times when I just need to talk and she just listens.

She knows I will and I have done the same for her.

It's called Best Friend Therapy and it really works.

My BFF and I!

God Bless,

Kaitie

Secret Admirer

From Google Images

I have always loved receiving handwritten letters. There is nothing more exciting to me than opening up my mailbox to find a letter from a long-lost friend. With technology letters aren't as common as they used to be. It is kind of disheartening if you think about. I love the time that someone takes to actually sit down and write a letter. A handwritten letter. It means something more than just the everyday text or email.

I was thinking the other day how neat it would be to have a secret admirer. I know, I am old-fashioned and this blog is proving it. But just hear me out for a second. How sweet would it be for you to go to your mailbox and find a handwritten letter from a boy stating that he thinks you are an amazing girl with a gorgeous smile. It would make your heart pound, wouldn't it? 

Would you write back? Let's say yes, you would write back. To be honest, I would. I have no clue what I would write. Maybe I would ask some of his favorite hobbies, if he hangs out with my friend group, etc. But there would be one thing constantly on my mind... What does this boy look like? 

It is very important that you attracted to someone you date. Looks aren't everything. This is for certain, but you do have to be attracted to the person you date. 

So... let's say that you and your secret admirer have been writing back and forth for a quite awhile. You have fallen for this guy within the exchange of handwritten letters that get longer and longer the more you write to each other. It is finally time that you find out who your secret admirer is. You are nervous. You are excited. You... don't think he's attractive. 

What do you do now? You don't think this is guy is attractive. At all. But you LOVE his personality and all the letters and feelings that are exchanged. What do you do? Friend-zone him? Ignore him the rest of your life? Both seem logical, right?

To be honest, I think I would friend zone him. I know that makes me sound awful, but I don't want to ignore this guy whom I have a lot in common with. A guy who genuinely thinks I am an amazing girl. What do you say to him? Look, I really have enjoyed this back and forth communication, but I'm just not attracted to you physically? Yeah, okay. I don't know. I've never been in this situation. Remember, I'm speaking hypothetically. 

You wouldn't want to lead him on though. That would not be right by any means. Don't pretend to be attracted to someone you aren't.

However, let me say this. The more you look at the good in people and fall in love with someone's personality the more they become attractive to you. Seeing beautiful things in people make them beautiful to you. You find yourself actually thinking they are attractive. I have experienced this. I promise it happens. They might not be the hottest human-being, but you aren't either. Sorry, but it's the truth.

Anyway, this is not my point. If you have made it this far in reading this blog, then props to you. You are about to read the true meaning of the reason I spent the time typing this blog. (If only, I could handwrite it for you.) 

So here it goes....

What if you were the secret admirer? What if you were writing to this guy that you wanted to notice you? A guy you truly could see yourself being with? Okay, so I don't have the guts to write a handwritten love note to a guy; but we are being hypothetical and I do. 

So... I write this love letter expressing my feelings. The guy writes back and we begin to write back and forth. This is going somewhere. Well, until we meet face-to-face and he doesn't think I'm beautiful. What happens? Does he friend-zone me? Does he ignore me?

What if... I was writing to Jesus. We met face-to-face and He didn't want anything to do with me because I was so ugly. I was unattractive. Well, you see the thing is I am unattractive because of the sin that is in my life. I am rotten to the core. Jesus doesn't like it. 

However, He doesn't turn His back on me because He has fallen in love with me. He wants a relationship with me. He see's the good in me and that makes me beautiful. The cool thing is that Jesus can take all the ugliness, unattractiveness in my life and make it beautiful.

He makes me beautiful because He sees the girl who loves Him and is committed to being a better person for Him. He sees a girl who is committed to following Him. He sees His not-so-secret admirer, His daughter reaching for help in this crazy life.  

The best thing in all of this is that Jesus died for me to make me beautiful even before I was His not-so-secret-admirer. What love!

Seek the beauty in other people. Not the negative. Let Jesus make you beautiful from the inside out.

God Bless,

Kaitie

Wanted

I was watching a movie the other day called October Baby. Yes, I cried.

For those of you who do not know, I was born in October and I was adopted by my daddy. So this movie really got me thinking about how blessed I am that I am wanted.

I love my momma and daddy with my whole being. God could not have blessed me with better parents who care and want the best for me. God has given me parents who truly want me, who truly love me.

Don't you just love the feeling of being worth something to someone? Everyone wants that feeling. We all have the desire to be needed by someone. Some of us fill this desire of being wanted by earthly things and earthly love.

We fail to realize that God wants us. He truly loves and cares for us.

This gaping hole that needs to be filled, God can fill. While God is my number one, He blessed me with a godly, God-fearing daddy to fill the need of an earthly father. A daddy who truly wants me while my bi-logical dad could care less.

My daddy is my hero. My daddy is my only daddy. I love him for all he is. I love him and am grateful that he wanted me.

God Bless,
Kaitie

Sunday's and Country

Sunday Afternoon's and Country Music.

Life can't get much better than this.

God Bless,
Kaitie