Closure

Closure

Not having closure is like not having a punctuation mark at the end of a sentence or a complete

(See what I did there?)

I have been in deep thought lately about the word 'closure.' What does it mean to have true closure over a situation, a relationship? Is not having closure a bad thing? Does closure really help us move on with things in our life to focus on better things for us? So many thoughts begin to race my mind as I think of the simple word 'closure.' However, while it may be a simple word to speak it is not a simple word to digest in means of living and moving on. (This may sound scattered, but bear with me. I promise that I am doing my best to explain my over-thinking mind.)

Closure

Not having closure is like not having a punctuation mark at the end of a sentence

Ever had a break up where there was absolutely no closure? It can drive one mad, I tell you. Not knowing the what-if's, not knowing if your ex is over you, not knowing if there could ever be anything "better." Like I said, it can drive one mad.

However, the word 'closure' is technically defined as coming to an end. So if something stops unexpectedly, a relationship ends suddenly, has the circumstance not ended? Even if it may not be "over" or "ended" in our minds, the situation has still ended. Hasn't it? But then again, my mind is mad because I have lacked closure so the answer is not a simple yes... Or is it?

Notice if you take the first three letters away of the word 'closure' you are left with the word 'sure.' Ironic? Maybe. Maybe not.

(By the way, I am not getting technical here, okay? I am just analyzing the word 'closure' for myself. So yes, what I may make notice of may be completely false; but welcome to my thought process. After all, is reading my blog mainly to read my thought process anyway?)

So... back to the word 'sure.' How are you sure that you have closure? Are you sure when you don't think about the situation or person anymore or for at least long periods of time? (Say, um, two days straight? Ha, okay.)

Maybe being sure that you finally have closure is knowing that yes, every now and then you will be reminded of the situation or person, but deep down in your heart you know "the end" is better for you. You know that you are happier without... Even if that means you don't have full closure? This brings me to my next point of my scattered thoughts.

Closure

Not having closure is like not having a complete

So what if you are sure that you have closure. What if not having closure is having closure. Okay, okay this sounds like the saying, "You can't have your cake and eat it too." But again, just bear with me. What if you know without a doubt that the situation or relationship is over. There does not need to be closure because you are able to follow your gut instinct, your heart to know that it is over. So, whether or not you and the people involved have had mutual closure, you know that not having closure is having closure. A sure form of closure. Make sense? Okay. (I am going to pretend you nodded yes.)

Different scenario: What if you aren't certain that the situation or relationship is over, yet you know that you will never go back even if the opportunity did arise? Is not that having closure? Again, this closure may not be mutual especially considering that you could possibly go back to the situation. However, you know that it is best (whether you want to or not) not to go back to the situation or relationship. Is that not a form a closure? While this may not be a sure form of closure, you still have closure. Make sense? Okay. (Again, you are nodding your head yes in my mind.)

Closure

All in all, maybe not having an ending punctuation mark or complete thought is perfectly

God Bless,
Kaitie

Father's Day

I would like to take this time to simply say Happy Father's Day to all the dads, grandpas, and father-figures out there. I would also like to take the time to let those who are missing their dad or father-figure today that I am praying for you. I am praying for those dad's who have lost their children. I am praying for those who do not have a father in their life. 

I want you to know that if you do not have an earthy father you have a Heavenly Father who loves you unconditionally and He will never forsake you. Never. 

I also, want to take the time to say Happy Father's Day to the world's best dad, my dad, (Yes, I'm bias.) I love him with my whole-being and while my biological dad wanted nothing to do with me I am thankful that he stepped up to be a man that he did not have to be. He is my true daddy. I even look like him and share his characteristics. (God always knows what He is doing.) He leads by example and I strive to follow his example of leadership and his servants heart for others. I will always be his little girl.

Love you, Daddy!

God Bless,

Kaitie 

Catchy Songs

Ever have a song stuck in your head just for the simple fact that it is catchy? Well, I am there right now. I have the song Be Ok by Ingrid Michaelson stuck in my head.

Luckily, I know more than two lines because we all know that typically when we get a song stuck in our head we only know two lines. Therefore, we constantly repeat them over and over and we know that we are getting on peoples nerves because we are getting on our own nerves.

Well, this is my random blog for the day. Yay, me.

Have a wonderful Friday! :)

God Bless,
Kaitie

Saturday Morning Coffee

This is a post another blog of mine that was written in the Fall of 2012. I know that is awhile back, but I really wanted to share this with y'all. It makes my heart happy to read these words.

Today I met with a family friend for a class assignment. I had to interview a woman who was or is currently in a women's ministry leadership position. Let me begin by saying that I have never enjoyed an assignment as much as I did this one.

I have never really talked one-on-one with this lovely lady. We have always been acquaintances. I know her because she is one of my aunts best friends. However, today, that has changed.

After an hour or so of sipping coffee, chit chat, and me interviewing her about her life in ministry I consider her a new friend.

When I woke up this morning I was having such a difficult time making myself get out of bed. I was excited about meeting with her and picking her brain on things, but it's Saturday. The last thing I wanted to do was get up at 7am to do a homework assignment.

Once, I was at the local coffee shop and sitting with her and listening to her wise words and advice, I totally forgot about having to get up early. I was enjoying myself and felt myself being inspired. She is such a phenomenal women. I think we could have talked forever. (We are girls though and Lord knows we love to talk!)

I don't know how your Saturday is going, but my Saturday morning coffee with a new friend has definitely made my whole day and it's only 11:12am!

God Bless,

Kaitie

Late Night Thinking...

Typically, late night thinking does not do me much good. In fact, if I liked taking medicine the moment I felt not so-good-thoughts pop into my mind I would take some sleeping pills to avoid losing sleep to meaningless pondering.

However, tonight is different. I am unable to sleep because I am thinking about how blessed I am to be right where I am. I could not imagine being any place else or even wanting to be any place else. (I could do away with my Biology class, but that is for a totally different blog post. Ha.) Seriously though. I am truly happy. I am truly blessed beyond what I deserve.

It amazes me how days (even moments) add up to lead you to where you need to be. 

Those nights that I have been wide awake thinking about how I could have done things better, made better choices, etc. have actually led me to be thinking about all the positives tonight. Without the hardships, the tears, the letdowns, the mistakes I would not be able to know what good I have now.

*Note that during the hardships, the tears, the letdowns, the mistakes that I did have it good it was just difficult for my eyes to realize that I was being prepared for something better. I was growing up.

I am still growing up. I am still learning. I am still making mistakes. I am still going to go through some hardships and letdowns. I will even have more tears. However, I know that the outcome when everything is said and done that I will be a better person because of them if I choose to grow from those moments and not relive them every night.

Late night thinking is often dangerous, but being able to train your brain to think about positive things in your life can lead to late night thinking that is encouraging.

God Bless,
Kaitie

Breaking the Silence

Sometimes people may come off as rude or unsocial. Maybe this is the case sometimes. However, I have come to observe that we do not like awkwardness. We do not like awkward silence. So what do we do? We pull out our cell phones and look like we are doing something important.

Why do we not just strike up a conversation? We are just making the whole situation even more awkward by trying to ignore it.

Speak up. Strike up a conversation. People will surprise you in the fact that they are friendly. What are we so afraid of? We are so afraid to speak up. I challenge you and myself to speak up and break the silence.

God Bless,
Kaitie

When Did I Become Old Enough...

When did I become old enough to be attending friends weddings?

I know I am twenty and this is the time that people often become engaged, but I do not feel like all these people should be my friends.

Literally, this summer alone I have/had the option of attending five weddings. Five. Five weddings in which all the people getting married are 20-23 years old. What?

Here I am... single... no prospect... 20 years old...

It is sometimes kind of disheartening. I really want to be planning a wedding. I mean, what girl doesn't dream of her fairytale wedding with the Prince Charming waiting there at the altar?

I am not wanting to rush anything by any means. I know God has a plan, but sometimes I get a little impatient. Plus, it does not make it easier that your best friend has a boyfriend that you know that she is going to be marry (even though they have been only dating for a short while... you just know) and all your friends around you are planning away or even already married.

It is just so mind-blowing to me that I am in this stage of life.

I cannot wait to begin planning a wedding, but more importantly I cannot wait to plan a wedding with the man of my dreams. If I have to wait a little while longer for him to show up, okay. But... in all honesty sometimes that is not an easy thing... you know, to wait patiently.

Plus, Pinterest just makes the whole situation worse. Ha.

God Bless,
Kaitie